When Dad's away...

As you may or may not know, Cliff's job as a Peace Corps recruiter dictates that he travel to college campuses throughout the midwest. These absences are hard on everyone in our family, so we rely on e-mail to stay in touch. The following is an actual e-mail exchange from earlier this week.

To: cliftonofun@yahoo.com
From: aminchicago@yahoo.com
Subject: Adults do strange things

Dad,

Help me out here - I'm confused. Mom was just holding me and we were in that room in the house where you guys torture me with baths, which you claim are supposed to be relaxing, though I beg to differ. Mom was standing in front of that place where we can see the cute baby - I think you call it a mirror? She was holding me with one arm, and with the other arm she started moving this purple stick in and out of her mouth, and then foam started forming at the edge of her lips. What's up with that? She's okay, right?

You guys do the strangest stuff ... it's really kind of me to put up with it.

Love you,
Sam

PS - Mom says to tell you not to think less of her because she didn't brush her teeth until 11:30. Dad, what are teeth?

***

To: aminchicago@yahoo.com
From: cliftonofun@yahoo.com
Subject: Re: Adults do strange things

Hi Sam,

I'm so glad you wrote with some questions; no matter how busy I am or where I might be, I always have time to answer your questions about life.

First of all, that room you were in is called the "bathroom." It makes sense when you think about it: after all, that is the room where we give you baths.

Secondly, you might have noticed that the pretty lady in the mirror looks just like your mommy. Well, that's because the mirror is a two dimensional reflective surface...there's no one in the mirror, but the mirror can reflect people who stand nearby. What does that mean, Sam? It means the cute baby in the mirror is actually you! Cool, eh?

Third, teeth grow in people's mouths to help us chew food that's harder than milk. You don't need teeth yet, since you pretty much drink every meal. Once you get them, though, and you start grinding up food, you'll notice something: teeth get really dirty. That's why we clean our teeth with brushes, just like the way we clean your body with wash rags. Hopefully, that makes sense.

Tell your mom I don't think less of her, but that I really hope she wasn't still wearing pajamas at 11:30 too.
Dad